Metal Gear Solid 4

Ever since my friend, Thomas, got me involved with Metal Gear Solid all those years ago, I've been a huge fan. My interest in MGS borders on obsession. With that in mind, I think it's an understatement to say that I've been excited about the release of Metal Gear Solid 4. I took two days off of work in anticipation of its release. I bought the $600 limited edition PS3 bundle straight from Konami. And I've been playing the game, more or less, nonstop since I first plugged the machine into my TV on Thursday afternoon.

I don't plan on talking about the plot much, but there will probably be some spoilers that come in the following paragraphs. You've been warned.

My official opinion: It's pretty okay.

The first time I played through it, my final time was around 21 hours. Less than about half of that was spent actually playing the game. That means that over half of the game was cut-scenes. Beautiful cut-scenes, they may be, but there gets to a point that enough is enough. I like to play my games.

When you do get to play, though... The gameplay is interesting. The button layout is altered drastically in favor of a more standard FPS layout... Should buttons = triggers... Left stick = move... Right stick = move camera. Once you get used to it, it works out pretty well. I also enjoy additions to Snake's moves. He can now jump sideways, crawl super slowly like an inch worm, roll onto his back, couch-walk, and preform a plethora of CQC moves. They introduced CQC in MGS3, so good old Solid Snake never had that kind of physical prowess. It's pretty fun.

The Octocamo is pretty neat. You can just blend in with the environment. You still have a camo index (ala MGS3), but they don't really talk much about how the radar was improved (which they really should have... when I found out that it showed the radius that Snake is visible from... It blew my mind). You don't get any special powers from the camo, though. And you can only collect a few of the patterns for later use. Supposedly you'll be able to download new patterns, but I can't see it making much of a difference. It seems that instead of collecting camo patterns, there's more a focus on collecting weapons. Which brings me to my next point.

One aspect of the game that seemed to be a double edged sword is Drebin and his shop. You get points for collecting duplicate guns from your enemies. You can then use these points to purchase new weapons and ammo. This is kind of cool because there are a few really fun weapons (my favorite: the shotgun). Also, you never run out of ammo. This is important because you do a lot of battling.

Unfortunately, there's too much battling. MGS has always been about stealth and cunning. MGS4 downplays the stealth in favor of giving you big guns that you can use to tear up the battlefield. And when I say "battlefield" I mean "battlefield". You're not really on a sneaking mission. You're on a battlefield trying to get from point A to point B while avoiding and/or killing the two opposing factions. The play areas are huge and difficult to sneak across. It's almost too sweeping.

Another thing that bothered me was the codec. There were only 2 codec stations. One of my favorite parts of MGS3 was the ridiculous radio chatter. It's a shame that with all those returning characters, they couldn't squeeze in more codec chats. They could have cut back on the cut scenes and increased the number of optional codec chats. I guess it was just easier to advance the story this way.

Speaking of which... the story was pretty good. It tied up all the loose ends and explained everything that needed explaining. It was a fantastic conclusion to a fantastic series. That being said... I did find some of the plot a little far fetched. Even for MGS. It seems to me that it suffered from the same thing that X3 suffered from: They tried to press too much story into to small a space. Even with 12 hours of cut scenes, it felt rushed.

Also, I'm not a fan of the whole nanomachine thing. That's their explanation for everything these days. Nanomachines did this. Nanomachines did that. It just gets old for me. In MGS4, everyone is a clone or part clone or a science experiement or enhanced by nanomachines. All the bosses were child soldiers with nanomachines and robot suits (or something... just go with it).

I think the main reason I liked MGS3 better is because Naked Snake / Big Boss is just a man. A super awesome man, but a man non-the-less. The same goes for all the other characters. They're all just men (except for The Boss, who is a woman, and Volgin, who was part lightning bolt).

Anyway... With all that said, I still really enjoyed the game. It was fun. So fun, I played it twice (and just started on a 3rd go). As said before, however, the cut-scene-to-play-time ratio is just really poor. That's where Metal Gear Online comes in.

I'm willing to excuse the lack of game play because the story needed to be told. Thankfully, Metal Gear Online was included in the pack. Metal Gear Online is essentially the MGS4 game mechanics (typically minus the octo camo) in an online multiplayer environment.

When you sign up, initially, you get to create your own character. You can customize your face, clothing, voice, and special skills. You can then take your character into deathmatches and team battles and capture the flag. Instead of the immortal Solid Snake, you get to play as a regular guy ( Naked Snake? ) put in a battle field situation with no story and no cutscenes. Just game play.

It's really a lot like a combination of Halo and Counter-Strike as far as match making goes. But when you get into the match, you've go all of Snake's bad-ass moves and MGS4-style gameplay. Other than the lack of interesting codec conversations about shit-tanks, it's my perfect game.

So, to sum up:

Metal Gear Solid 4 is pretty okay. It's a fantastic conclusion and wraps up all the loose ends. Personally, I prefer Metal Gear Solid 3, mainly because it's got a more human feel to it. In no way do I regret my purchase because even though MGS4 may not have a ton of replay value... MGO will keep me occupied for quite some time.

At least... It'll keep me occupied until I get fed up with douchebags with no lives who use cheap moves to destroy casual gamers like myself. (When I typed "man, I really suck lol!", some asshat actually told me all I needed was practice. This game hasn't been out for a week yet and this tool thinks he's the shit because he's been doing nothing all weekend but learning all the cheap tricks required to pwn noobs who played through the single player game first. Fuck you, asshole.)

Until next time,

~Ben

PS: Snake's mustache is fireproof. I like to think it's the awesomeness and not the nanomachiens that make it so.

Classic Wisdom: Lament of a Batsplosion

I've been slacking off again. Bad Ben! And what happens when I slack? I post a classic wisdom.

Man, we haven't successfully exploded anything in years. We tried to explode a chicken on new years. But that failed hard due to my inexperience. "Next time!" I say, "Next Time!".

Back in the day, we weren't so ambitious and our attempts were more fruitful. This Wisdom references this comic: (http://www.poonheads.com/comics/?id=8)

Lament of a Batsplosion

This is based on a true story.

One evening, the Poonheads got together and were hanging out, looking for stuff to do. We had a failed art project (a paper mache bat) and we had some fireworks, both complements of Pillboy... So we went outside and blew up the bat. Well... we tried to. It didn't blow up. Because we didn't secure the explosives well enough inside the bat, it actually flew towards us. So afterwards, we used the Batsplosion as a Batarang, and it got stuck in a tree.

The rest of the night was filled with many interesting memories including a suicidal squid, torturing Mark with Mello Yello and Donovan, and sliding down the stair case on a sleeping bag. Good times were had by all.

Anyways... I was quite happy with the way this comic turned out. Good art. Good punch line. And hey... Who can't love the Batsplosion? Ain't he cute?

In other news... I've been slacking off... I've gotten hooked on Anarchy Online, so my time has been consumed by that lately and not been where it should be -- Poonheads.com. I'm sorry. But, you'll be glad to know, I've cancelled my subscription and will be atteption to devote more of my time to Poonheads. ... When I'm not devoting it to more important things like sleeping and playing Halo. And who's idea was it to make Halo NOT x-box live compatible? I'm going to have to wait until NOVEMBER for Halo 2 to play with other people, huh... until then I'm going to get sniped to death by Drew... Damn you Drew... Damn you to a Sniper Rifle-less Hell!

Weekly Wisdom: Please Sweep your Patio!

~~Benabus

Ironically, I later got re-addicted to Anarchy Online and un-addicted to Halo. Recently, my AO account expired and I forgot to re-subscribe because I've been busy. That's okay, though. By the end of the year, they're supposed to switch to the Age of Conan graphics engine. I'll probably resubscribe then. So that I can become more unsocial than I am now.

~Ben


Resources:
Anarchy Online: (http://www.anarchy-online.com)

Codename: Gung Ho

When I was a kid I played with action figures. I had a lot of them. As I got older, I stopped playing and took to collecting them. During high school, I almost exclusively collected anime characters and things with chainsaws. When I started college, I pretty much gave it up because I had better things to do and no good place to display my collection.

Last Christmas, I got a glass display case where I was able to display all the figures I had boxed up for the past few years. I hadn't really bought anything new, save a couple of Final Fantasy figures when Advent Children had come out.

Lately, though... There's been something wrong with me. I find myself heading to the toy aisle every time I go to Wal-mart or Target. I blame David Willis (http://www.shortpacked.com/). But say la vee, as they say.

Why am I telling you this? Well, I thought it might be a good idea to give a little background before I start telling you about my latest purchase: G.I. Joe's Gung Ho.

In the past there were two kind of GI Joes... The 3.5 inch ones and the 12 inch ones. Over the past couple of years, starting with the Sigma 6 line, they've started making 8 inch scale figures. This is awesome because it's like a middle ground. They're not super tiny, but they're not super big. They're a little cartoony looking, but I think that's one of the reasons I like them.

I've been wanting to get one for a while, but never could bring myself to do it for one reason or the other. Then they came out with Gung Ho, who, as we all know, is super awesome. He's a marine, and he doesn't wear a shirt, and he has a sweet mustache. This particular version doesn't go shirtless, but he's still awesome. Just look at that mustache:



Tell me that's a not mug to fall in love with.

As a toy, this is a pretty great figure. He's jointed in all the right areas, so he can assume tons of poses. He's got big huge feet that are jointed at the ankle which allow him to stand easily and remain very stable, even while he's carrying his huge-ass gun.



He came equipped with a machine gun, a removable helmet, a knife and sheath, a belt, body armor, and a hugely useless 'multi-tool'. It's this huge thing as big as the figure with foldable tools including an axe, a knife, a shovel and an awl. They could have given him a machete, or a backpack or something, but instead they give him a stupid multi-tool. It's not much of a gimmick. The machine gun's gimmick isn't much better. You pull the ammo strip through the gun and the barrel moves back and forth. Laa-aame. I have to say, though... His Kung-Fu grip makes up for it.



People always talk about G.I. Joes and the Kung-Fu grip. I've never seen one with any kind of kung-fu grip. Upon wikipedia-ing it, I learned that, originally, Kung-Fu grip was just a rubber hand which made it easier to hold his guns and stuff. Now, it's a hand with spring loaded fingers which makes it easier to crush your opponents into diamonds, like Superman. It makes me happy. I can now say that I've got the G.I. Joe with The Kung Fu Grip.

The only thing I don't like about my Gung-Ho is that he's got hair. Under his detachable helmet he has a dark brown buzz cut. Gung Ho is supposed to be super bald, which added to his characters. But, as long as I keep his helmet on, I can pretend.

In the end, it was a satisfying purchase and, at $10, I feel no buyer's remorse. Sure, in my day, a GI Joe should have costed 3 or 4 dollars, but with inflation, I figure 10 bucks is a pretty good buy these days. I'll probably buy another if I see one that strikes my fancy. Or if they make one of Scarlett (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scarlett_%28G.I._Joe%29).

Until next time...

~~Ben

Guitar for the Soul

It may come as a surprise to some that I play guitar. I would think, anyways. I guess when I look at myself in the mirror I just don't see a guitar player.

I'm not super good. But I'm not super bad, either. I just play for fun. For myself. It's the one thing that I doubt will ever have a chance of becoming a chore.

Unlike comicking, guitar playing doesn't take any set up. When drawing, I have to take out my paper and pencils and erasers and stuff. With my guitar I just reach over, grab the sucker and start playing. I'm able to be creative. I create something that will not have to be cleaned up or stored away.

It's not like coding in that I don't have to think about it. Coding requires analytical thinking. Guitar playing is mostly muscle memory. Yet, it's not passive like watching TV or listening to music. When I'm sitting there, I'm actually moving my fingers. I'm an active participant. I find guitar playing to be very satisfying.

It's kind of like meditating. I can just sit back and relax, sometimes not think about anything, sometimes think about everything. But I'm able to focus because my hands are busy with the strumming and the fretting. I find it difficult to talk while I'm playing, but I think about all kinds of things.

Music making is good for the soul. When I come home, no matter how hard of a day I've had, or how tired I may be, there's always enough left in me to pick up my Strat and finger a tune. It clears my head and revitalizes me, if only for a moment.

I would highly recommend taking up a musical instrument. Something that's easy to start, but complex enough to keep you from getting bored. Portability is another consideration. A guitar isn't that portable, but I stay in my room a lot. I've been known to take a harmonica with my on trips, though. So, maybe something like that.

Start off slow and don't get frustrated. Remember, you're doing it for fun. If you get angry with it, it won't help soothe anything, especially not the soul. Just screw around with it, making sounds that appeal to you. Doesn't matter if it makes a song or not. Eventually, if you like the instrument, you'll get bored with just making noise and try to learn a song or two. Don't get frustrated if you can't get them right away. Just set it down and come back later. Remember that you're playing for fun. I've been playing for around 7 years now, and I don't know more than 10 songs total. But it's still fun.

One other thing to consider is the people you live with. Don't play so loudly that you bother everyone around you. They'll just come in and bitch you out and that's no fun. So, keep it respectable. That's why I don't use an amp (http://youtube.com/watch?v=ZovZ6phyXSo).

And if it turns out that music's just not your thing... well, I'm sure there's something else out there that could help you relax. Maybe yoga. Or a bonsai tree. All I know is that my guitar is important to my own mental well-being, so it might be of some help to yours.

Until next time,

~~Ben

The Knife Collector

I like knives. I've been attracted to knives since I was a kid. There's just something about them that appeals to me.

I suppose it could be argued that it's some kind of latent homosexual tendency because of the phallic nature of the knife, but that argument could be made for a lot of things. I think it's more of a nerd thing rather than a gay thing. It would be one thing if I were a hunter who hunted and stuff, but I'm not. So it must be because I'm a nerd. For some reason, nerds tend to be attracted to knives and swords and guns. Nobody really knows why.

I feel so ashamed when I walk past the knife case at Wal-Mart or Academy and pause for a minute to look at the new Bucks. I try my hardest to be non-nerd in public, but it's so difficult sometimes. It's embarrassing, but sometimes you just can't hide who your are.

So, why knives over guns or leather thongs? Sure. As weapons, they're not as effective as guns, but I can't say I've ever been in a gun fight. Guns, however, are illegal in Russian knife fights, so I'd say it evens out. And leather thongs tend to make my balls hurt. I think the thing I like most about knives is the utility. You can do lots of things with knives. Like cut things. And if it's a Swiss-Army knife, you can uncork wine bottles. But mainly, you can cut things.

So, anyway. I like knives. I own a lot of knives. I have big knives and small knives. Some of them were really expensive. Others... not so much. In fact, out of all the knives I own, the one I use the most is a cheap, single blade tactical folder.

It's about 4 inches closed, 7 inches open. It's mostly stainless steel with cheap plastic grips glued onto the sides. It's got a pocket clip on the backside, which I never use because it sits on my desk where I'll always know where it is. The thumb post (which can be changed around for left-handed use) allows for one-handed opening, but I've loosened the action so that I can flick it open rather easily without using the thumb-post. It's a locking blade, but it won't lock unless I flick it open real hard. The clip point blade is partially serrated which makes cutting through cardboard really easy.

I mostly use it as a letter opener, but it lends itself to general desk type cutting. It cuts tape, sharpens pencils, opens packages and cleans fingernails. In a pinch, I suppose I could kill a bear with it, but I rarely get attacked by bears. And I've got other knives that would be better suited for that purpose, anyway. Also, it gives me something to play with while I thinking of something to write about.

So, it's not a super good knife (it's not even very sharp), but I like it. I'd probably be lost without it and if ever it gets lost in my seat cushion or under my keyboard, I would probably cry.

I've said all I can say about this particular knife. I have others, though. I'll probably discuss the rest of my collection in more detail in the future because coming up with new and exciting things to write about ever day is really tough. Regular features make my life a lot easier. So, look forward to future knife write ups.

Until next time,

~~Ben

Mad leet guitar skillz

Some of you may know that I'm a pretty sweet guitar player. In fact, I'm probably the best guitar player ever. It's okay if you don't believe me. My hardcore raw style isn't for everyone, and I can understand why people would say nay.

Those of you who know that I play guitar may be aware that I've written a song or two. And they're all really fucking awesome. When I'm not writing my own awesome songs, I learn other peoples awesome songs.

Probably the first song I ever learned to play on my guitar is Aeris's Theme from Final Fantasy 7. Having played this song for many many years now, I've played around and made it my own.

You can listen to my sweet ass rendition of said song here: CLICK HERE.

It's not the best recording. I used Sound Recorder and a shitty microphone. And also, I don't really know much about recording music.

Anyways. Let me know what you think. Unless you think I suck. In which case, you can shove it.

~~Ben

Moving in Stereo

As some of you may know, one of my many hobbies is stereoscopy. That is, taking 3D pictures. The concept is simple. You have two eyes. Each eye sees things from a slightly different perspective, thus creating depth. This effect can be duplicated with cameras by taking a picture with two cameras (a few inches apart) at the same time. Then, if you put the two pictures side-by-side, and cross your eyes so that the images overlap, you get a 3D picture.

With a 'stereo pair', you can do all sorts of other things. You can make an animated "Time-Space Jiggle", where the animation flashes on image, then the other, then the first, etc. tricking the mind into seeing depth. You can use a computer program to create a depth map. You can make up one of those "red-blue" 3d glasses images. You can even make a magic eye.

So what's my point? Well. Yesterday, I finished setting up a server in my room. This would be the 3rd computer in my room: My laptop, my desktop, and now my server. I was explaining to a friend about how awesomely geeky I feel, now that I have 3 monitors closely surrounding me for no real reason. He told me to take a picture. So I did one better. I took a stereograph. And, for your viewing pleasure, I present to you... My desk setup in 3D:

• The Stereograph Just cross your eyes until the two images are on top of each other


• The Animation with Time Space Jiggle. No eye crossing required

One day, I'll trade in my cheapo home made stereo camera for something that takes decent pictures. Until then, I'll continue using this baby.

So, until next time.

~Ben